Grief Affects Behaviors, Feelings, Thoughts (Including Memory), & Body

 

Grief affects all the areas of a person: behaviors, feelings, thoughts and physical body. Each grief experience is unique. A woman may experience all, some or none of the symptoms of grief. Below are some of the common manifestations.

Behaviors

• Absent-Minded Behavior
• Accident–Prone (because of being easily distracted)
• Avoidance of Tasks
• Appetite Disruptions (either too much or not enough food)
• Difficulty Making Decisions
• Disinterest in Activities That Used to Bring Pleasure
• Disorganized
• Dreams/Nightmares About the Loss
• Easily Distracted
• Focus Only on the Negative of the Lost Person/Place, Thing/Idea
• Focus Only on the Positive of the Lost Person/Place, Thing/Idea
• Fragile
• Inattention to People/Circumstances at Hand
• Inability to Focus
• Inability to Pray
• Irritability
• Loss of Perspective
• Mood Swings
• Passivity/Resignation
• Sleep Disruptions (either too much or not enough)
• Social Withdrawal and/or Overly Clingy

Feelings

• Anger
• Anxiety
• Apathy
• Bitterness
• Confusion
• Despair
• Emptiness
• Endless
• Fear
• Feeling Crazy or Like You Are Losing Your Mind
• Frustration
• Guilt
• Helplessness
• Hopeless
• Lack of Belonging
• Loneliness
• Loss of or Increased Faith
• Numbness
• Outrage
• Overwhelmed by the Pain of Earlier Losses That Weren’t Grieved Over
• Regrets
• Relief
• Roller Coaster of Emotions and Feelings
• Sadness
• Self-Pity
• Silliness
• Shock
• Yearning

Thoughts

• Confusion
• “I didn’t realize it would be this hard.”
• Lack of Concentration
• Mental Anguish
• Ruminating About the Loss a Lot
• Time Distortion (feels too fast or too slow)
• “What’s the Use?”
• “Why?”

“Grief disrupts your mind and thinking abilities. Confusion moves in and memory takes a vacation. . . Just as your leg can experience a cramp and not move, it’s as though your mind has a memory cramp. Your mind is paralyzed and shuts down…” (Wright, 12-13)

Physical Symptoms

• Deadens/Heightens Every Sense
• Depression
• Disbelief/Denial
• Doing Anything Requires Extra Effort (even simple tasks)
• Empty Feeling in the Stomach
• Exhaustion (physical and emotional)
• Flashbacks
• Grief Spasms 1 
• Lack of Energy
• Many/Little Tears
• Memory Loss
• Panic Attacks
• Rapid Heart Rate
• Sensation of Aimlessness
• Shock
• Shortness of Breath
• Surprise at Intensity and Suddenness of Emotions
• Tightness in the Chest and/or Throat
• Weakened Immune System

Action Steps

1. As you look over these common symptoms of grief, which one(s) describe you?
2. What has surprised you about this list?
3. How does it make you feel to know that these are common manifestations of grief?
4. Are you acknowledging your grief or are you ignoring it?
5. What is one healthy step that you can take today to deal with your grief?

Related Posts

• It’s Important to Grieve the Little Losses too
• Mourning is a Choice
• Every Loss Can Bring Grief
• Sometimes Nothing is the Best Thing to Say
• Chronic Pain Brings Losses to Grieve
• 4 Ways Grief Has Changed My Beliefs
• This Grief Attitude Annoys Me
• Loss Leads to Depression
• Time to Pray Away Love
• Dozen Ideas to Move Past the Blahs
• Live Well Today

Works Cited

Wright, H. Norman.  Experiencing Grief. Nashville: B&H Publishing Group, 2004.    

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1 A grief spasm is a normal, sudden, unexpected, upsurge of the emotion grief (Wright, 18). The best way to handle this out-of-control feeling is acknowledge that you can handle this intensely difficult emotion. And wait for it to end.