So when was the last time you belly laughed? Cried?
I really can’t remember when I last belly-laughed. Isn’t that sad? I’m sure I have in the past month but nothing is coming to mind. I think I need to keep a laughter journal.
However, I can remember the last time I cried. In fact, the last two times are memorable.
- Several weeks ago my son’s fiancé broke off their engagement. I cried because his heart was broken. I cried because once again love was contaminated by the Fall at the Garden of Eden. And I cried because it reminded me so much of my own heartache and loss of love.
- I cried this week because it was Valentine’s Day. Yes, it is hard to be a single, older, divorced woman in a culture that values younger (beautiful) couples. But that’s not why Valentine’s Day is so hard for me.
- It’s hard because in 2002, the weekend after Valentine’s Day, my-then-dh, said he wanted a divorce. Valentine’s Day reminds me of how broken promises have left their mark on me. Now I’ll think the same for my precious son. 😦
Now on that Valentine’s Day my-then-dh gave me a bunch of lovely flowers. Know why he gave them to me? “I didn’t want to get into trouble” he told me. I thought, “And what do you think you’re in now?”
Sounds funny now. Maybe if I concentrate enough on that, I can find the belly laughter.
I’ve found some help with my grief at Widow’s Quest. You don’t have to be a widow to experience grief. Anna has some good ideas on how to heal and take care of yourself in the process.
So, what has recently caused you deep laughter or pain filled tears?