Time to Pray Away Love

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747366_brokenLetting go of my broken marriage is hard for me to do. It’s been years and I still feel connected to my ex.

Albert: Honestly, I never knew I could feel like this. I’m going out of my mind. I want to throw myself off every building in New York. I see a cab and I want to dive in front of it because that way I’ll stop thinking about her.
Hitch: You will. Just give it time.
Albert: That’s just it. I don’t want to. I’ve waited my whole life to feel this miserable. If this is the only way I can stay connected with her, then this is who I have to be.

I can relate to Albert (a scene from the movie Hitch). Although by now, my passion is not self-destructive nor are the thoughts so constantly invasive.  In fact, I can go days and weeks without thinking about my ex.

But currently I am going through a Divorce Care group. . . . because I don’t believe that time heals inner wounds. Purposeful grieving does. So right now memories are being dredged. Emotions exposed. Thoughts are chaotic. Tears frequent. Grief is a close friend. I’m listening.

The other day while visiting with a friend, I heard God speak through her. “It’s time to let it go.”

Sigh. It’s time to let it go. But I can’t do this on my own. I need to pray away the (marital) love I have for him. I’d like God to unbreak my heart I’ll pray for you too.

Entry filed under: divorce, Grief, Main, Music, Prayer. Tags: .

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