M: What a MOTORCYCLE Reminds Me About Parenting

. at . 3 comments

 

Elizabeth is all packed for her first motorcycle camping trip to Big Sur.

Elizabeth is all packed for her first motorcycle camping trip to Big Sur.

“Don’t you tell her to stop?” 

“Aren’t you afraid for your daughter?”

These are the kinds of comments I get when folks learn that my 20-something daughter rides a motorcycle.Truthfully, I’m not usually afraid for her and I don’t tell her to stop.

Elizabeth is a careful rider.

  • She is hyper alert when riding.
  • She doesn’t drink and drive.
  • She has mitigated the risks by taking several riding classes.
  • She always wears full gear. Always.

I trust her. I trust God.

I know this trust doesn’t mean that nothing bad will happen. But I am not willing to spoil my peace by filling my mind with the “what if’s.”

If/when the bad happens, I will deal with it then, not before. That idea has been an anchor for 27 or so years when I first learned that my toddler son had sclerosis.

The prognosis was grim. A boy being diagnosed so young in life meant limited mobility, a back brace, surgery. But I remember God breathing this thought into my mind,  “Don’t worry about it today. If/when this happens, I will give you the grace to deal with it.”

This truth is similar to Scarlet O’Hara’s  (Gone With the Wind) “I will think about it tomorrow” coping device. But there is a difference.

The difference is God. I can and will deal will it (well) tomorrow because I know that God is with me. He will give me the grace and wisdom to handle any situation that comes into my life.

I’ve seen this to be true in the hard times in my life: financial woes, illness, death, divorce, (to name a few situations). And yes, I’ve “seen” God in parenting challenges and scares as well.

Parenting adult children is such a different task. My roles as guide and protector have slid from the forefront to the background. I think one of the best ways I can now parent Elizabeth is by trusting her, supporting her, and of course, praying for her.

I can choose to worry about the possible bad and nag. Or I can choose to trust, refresh my mind with the good, and praise my daughter.

I choose to trust. I choose the good. I choose to praise. In short, I choose God’s way.

Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. (Philippians 4:8, The Message)

In full disclosure, I am not perfect in this. There have been times I fretted, said the wrong things, and haven’t trusted my daughter and/or God.

Your Turn . . . What have you learned about parenting (well) an adult child?

Related Posts . . . 

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NOTE: This post is written for the Blogging From A to Z Challenge. There are 22 categories and my category is MI = Miscellaneous.

During the month of April I will post 26 times finishing up posts that have been in my draft fie for at least a year. For a list of all the posts go to the A-Z button on my header.

Today’s letter is M. The topic is about MOTORCYCLES and parenting.

Entry filed under: Blogging From A to Z Challenge, Main, Parenting. Tags: , , , .

L: What it Means to LISTEN Intentionally N: People I NEED When Life Stinks

3 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Denise Drake  |  . at .

    Yes! I agree with the no-nag policy for adult children. Who knows what great things God can do with a Christian motorcycling young woman! Surely she can reach people with the Gospel of Christ that we cannot. My goal, from day one as a parent, has been to keep a balance of involvement when my children grow up. Thanks for being a good example!

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    • 2. susan2009  |  . at .

      I do strive to not nag, Denise. But I have told my 2 adult children that I reserve the right to say anything once. Lately I have been rethinking even that policy. I think sometimes it might even be better to NOT say it once.

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  • […] What a MOTORCYCLE Reminds Me About Parenting […]

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